Confiteor Meme

Der Tommissar tagged me with this, so I reckon I have to do it. I don't think there's a given number of things you have to confess, so I'll just go until I run out of things to say.

• I confess ignoring my politics professor completely, and instead staring at the historical map of Europe that hangs behind her in the classroom thinking, for whole class periods at a time, things like "if the Germans had invaded the Netherlands, would the Schlieffen plan have actually worked?"
• I confess having been the type of child who said "that didn't hurt" when getting switched.
• I confess having to pull out a dictionary to write or read almost anything in Latin, even simple sentences.
• I confess not being able to tell a story effectively to save my life. I have attempted to recount some of the funniest stories I have ever heard. And failed miserably.
• I confess being an incorrigible grammar pedant -- the sort who goes nuts when people don't put a comma before the conjunction in a list. This condition is aggravated by dating a person who is one as well, and working a job that requires it.
• I confess once having had to show my driver's license to prove that I'm from the South because I haven't an iota of regional accent (really quite the opposite sadly).
• I confess being that guy who comments on and over-analyzes everything in a movie, and thus is always getting told "it's a MOVIE!!"
• I confess having successfully hidden a hole in the wall of my room behind a map for about 5 years, until I moved to college and my brother knocked the map down.
• I confess having said things that are so politically incorrect that they render others speechless and sometimes even cause them to abruptly and awkwardly end conversations.
• I confess having once effectively destroyed Windows by installing Norton antivirus incorrectly and having to salvage my system from a DOS prompt.
• I confess actually having been slightly afraid when Layla told me "if you ever have more books than will fit in one room on floor to ceiling shelves, I will leave you." Not because I think she's serious, but because I already have more books than any one sane person has any reasonable excuse for having.
• I confess having busted up a guiness run several months ago, when I was not yet 21, by virtue of our being in a state where they card everyone in the group. I was "that guy."

Let's see, now I have to find people who haven't gotten this yet. I tag Jason, Kevin, Lauren (when she gets her computer fixed), Moneybags, and Patrick. Y'all are it.

File Under: Miscellany